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Session 13

It takes three to make a thing go right

Read: Song of Solomon 7:1-8

The intimacy God created for marriage rivals no other on this earth. And while we want to believe a relationship like Solomon’s is possible, we still have questions:

  • Why do I need to marry to experience this?
  • Even though I am married, why am I not experiencing such closeness?

For many of us, reading about how Solomon delighted in his wife seems like is nothing more than a fairy tale. We grow weary of waiting, so we jump ahead of God's plan or run away from it completely.

But no matter how hard we try to create intimacy on our own, we can never experience the full joy God intends for our marriages if we're not putting Him first in our relationships. Whether you’re single or married, learning to rely on God's grace and God's strength is the first step to experiencing the oneness Solomon and his wife shared.

This means that if you’re single, God’s desire is for you to experience joy and contentment where you are right now. Maybe you’ve been married or had sex. No sin is too great that God’s grace can’t cover it. When we trust God with our dating lives, He gives us strength to remain pure and grace to overcome our pasts.

If you’re married, God’s desire for you and your spouse is to be one. He gives couples the strength to stay together and build a life together. And, He gives us grace as we learn to love each other, forgive one another, and communicate with each other.

The kind of relationship Solomon and his wife experienced takes time and commitment. It’s not a product of self-help, but a daily decision to listen to Jesus and do what He says — no matter how impatient we get with the process.


  • If you’re single, what’s one area of your dating life that needs to be surrendered to Jesus? If you’re married, what’s one issue where you and your spouse are divided?
  • What can you do this week to approach that situation, whether married or single, with God’s grace and strength?

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