Divorced? Four promises God wants you to embrace

Jay Phillips

There was a season when I couldn’t walk into a room without feeling like every eye was on me. I was the Christian who got divorced.

When I got married, I thought it would be forever. We knew Jesus, and we were in love. But two years in, the relationship began to break down and after a year of separation, the divorce papers were served.

I didn’t have a plan for this. I didn’t know how to recover from this. But God did. As I surrendered my unforgiveness and my pain, God revealed four promises that are true for me and are true for you.

Four Promises God Wants You to Embrace

1. God did not do this to you, and He is not mad at you.

Divorce breaks the marriage covenant, a promise between you and your spouse and God. God hates divorce because it’s a broken promise, a rebellion against Him. The Bible calls this sin.

When Christians talk about divorce, we often miss an important distinction: God hates divorce, not the divorced. God hates sin, not sinners. Jesus died for us in God’s greatest act of love to his children while we were still sinners (Romans 3:23).

2. You can overcome the pain, anger, and sadness.

I was a believer. I loved Jesus. I believed my sins were forgiven. But I had no victory, no peace and no joy in my life. I felt condemned all the time. I was worn-out, burned-out, frustrated and miserable.

The mistakes in my failed marriage led to guilt, baggage, and labels that I allowed to define me for a really long time. Romans 8:1 says, "there is NOW no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus."

Moving forward starts by letting God in.

I had to make the choice: Was I going to believe God’s Word or the negative thoughts that contradict God’s Word? The voice we respond to will determine the future we experience. If you keep hearing things that clearly are not from Jesus, who do you think is planting those thoughts in your mind? Who is known for telling lies?

Christian, we have a real enemy who wants nothing more than to allow you to wallow in the wreckage of your divorce. Moving forward starts by letting God in.

3. God can and will work through your divorce if you’ll let Him.

Romans 8:28 says, “in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." For everything to work together for our good, God has to be in control of all things (Ephesians 4:6). Everything that happens to us is God-allowed and God-filtered. Every ounce of pain, hurt, tears, emotions, and anger passed through God’s hands, and He has allowed it to happen.

We can waste a lot of time asking “Why?” Why doesn’t change the fact that the divorce happened. But asking God, “What are you teaching me?” can start a change in your heart that you never thought possible.  

4. God still wants to do great things in you and through you.

I thought God was finished with me. I assumed He couldn’t use me anymore because I was divorced, damaged goods. If you’re not dead, God’s not done.

I am a pastor, worship leader, full-time minister of the Gospel, and I’ve been divorced. Four years after my divorce, I’m remarried to the most incredible woman God ever created. She was not concerned with my past and loves me for who I am — a child of God, not the damaged, condemned, miserable, worn-out person I thought I was. We have a beautiful 11-month-old daughter. My little girl is a daily reminder that God is good, and His plans are greater than anything we could ever imagine.

If you’re not dead, God’s not done.

Looking back, it’s obvious that my healing and happiness was only possible because of Jesus. What’s the point of a Savior if there is nothing to be rescued from? I needed to be rescued from myself and all the lies I was believing. Through the promise of God’s Word and the relationships I built in this church, I am free and healed. This could not have been possible without Jesus.

So where are you with Jesus? If you don’t have a relationship with Him, if you’ve never fully given your life and your pain to Him, talk to someone today.

Related Content

to Discover More

Article

10 promises for Easter

resurrection promises easter

Without Easter, the Bible would be useless. Our whole faith and the power behind everything we believe and te... read more

Read Article

Article

Three questions to ask before you say “I do” again

healing divorce remarriage

“Till death do you part.” These are words that many of us have spoken and never realized that we ... read more

Read Article

Article

Top resources on divorce

divorce

Sometimes you fight hard for your marriage, and you still lose. As long as sin and selfishness exist in the w... read more

Read Article

Article

How to get past the doubts that hold you back

bible promises spiritual warfare

Ever had a dream in your heart but talked yourself out of going after it? Maybe your thoughts sound... read more

Read Article

Sermon

Four Promises

From The Table

April 15, 2019

family salvation celebration promises communion

The Jewish Passover meal was celebrated for thousands of years as the anticipated fulfilment of all God's... read more

Watch Sermon

Sermon

Washing Feet

From The Table

April 1, 2019

community salvation serving promises communion

Your life doesn't need to be marked by rush or repetition. Jesus invites us into a rhythm of abundant lif... read more

Watch Sermon

Story

Our marriage was over, but we found the hope to begin again

Jan 21, 2017

healing hope marriage salvation forgiveness love grace

Lindsay and Jeff Oehmen were divorced and living in separate states, but a divine intervention brought their ... read more

Read Story

Story

A second chance to marry my first love

Nov 29, 2016

salvation forgiveness divorce reconciliation remarriage

Mike and Sandi Piotrowski divorced after 17 years because of an affair, but an unlikely change of heart reuni... read more

Read Story

Story

How a husband walked out on his family and found his way back home

July 10, 2016

marriage divorce pornography adultery remarriage

Jake Tilley thought an affair would make him happy, but it left him emptier than ever. Then he came face to f... read more

Read Story

Story

Ed Byus got connected

March 17, 2019

family community serving purpose promises discipleship connect

Ed Byus retired from the U.S. Army and relocated to Greenville. Connect Classes helped him discover what

Read Story

Story

Kayla Oglesby got connected

April 25, 2019

family community serving purpose promises discipleship connect

Kayla Oglesby wasn't going to church and was struggling in her relationship with Jesus. Connect Classes g... read more

Read Story

What's happening at NewSpring Church?

  • Need to Know: Weekly email to keep you informed about what's happening at NewSpring
  • Fuse News: Email for Fuse parents sent on the first Monday of the month
  • KidSpring Scoop: Email sent at the beginning of each series to give you the scoop on what's happening in KidSpring
  • Read My Bible: Daily devotional sent via text from 6-7am

Subscribe