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Grieving? Here’s how to survive the holidays

By: beth marshall

What do you do when the happiest season of all doesn’t seem happy at all?

Whether it’s a scary medical diagnosis, the loss of a relationship or death of someone you love, a traumatic season of life can make the holidays feel overwhelming. Decorating, shopping, and house guests might be more than you can handle this year. Before you decide to pull the covers over your head and wake up in January or start your day with eggnog—stop! You are not alone.    

3 Steps to Survive the Holidays Without Losing Your Mind  

1. Say what you need to say. 

It’s a temptation for many of us, especially when cool weather hits, to spend a lot of time at home, alone. Maybe you’re facing crushing circumstances right now all by yourself. The problem with isolation comes when the little voice starts whispering in your head. The lying, conniving voice telling you, “Nobody understands. Life will always be this painful. Nobody cares about you.” Don’t believe the lies.

The sooner you ask for help and admit you need other people, the sooner you will find relief. To connect with someone who can help, stop by the Care Room on Sunday or reach out to someone in your NewSpring Group.

2. Make a plan.  

Don’t let the holidays sneak up on you. Consider doing things a little differently this year. Plan a time to talk with those closest to you about creating a strategy for the holidays. For example, this year will be the first Christmas for a dear friend since the death of her dad. She and her mom are discussing their strategy, which might include a few days in the Caribbean. 

Would a change in location, menu, or traditions be helpful this year? If the thought of decorating, entertaining, or gift buying is making you hyperventilate, it’s OK to bring it all down a notch. Do whatever works for you. 

3. Be still. 

Tomorrow morning, rather than hitting the ground running, would you take a few moments to be still? Wake up 15 minutes early, find a quiet cozy place away from the noise and chaos, and spend the first precious moments of your day with the Lord.

Psalm 34:18  promises, “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” You can know His indescribable peace when you invite Him in.


A great way to experience the peace of God is by spending time with God. If you're not sure where to get started, check out one of these studies.

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