Want Better Sex? Try This
Ashley Wheelon
There’s something important every married couple needs to talk about. That’s right, sex.
Some of you may have just blushed, a few of you probably giggled, and, if you’re anything like my husband, you may have even let out a “Hallelujah!”
People either love talking about sex or they hate talking about sex. And if you’re looking for some guidance, you’ve got two extremes to choose from. The church hammers home the principle that sex should be saved for marriage but after that, the talk dies down pretty quickly. On the other hand, our culture talks so much about sex there’s nothing special about it at all.
A healthy sex life is part of a healthy marriage. Proverbs 5:18-19 (and all of Song of Songs) encourages married couples to enjoy each other.
God is for great sex in marriage, and to get there, we have to learn to talk about it. Because communicating with each other about what goes on in the bedroom creates an even deeper intimacy inside and outside the bedroom.
3 Guidelines For Talking About Sex
1. Talk about sex with your spouse.
While it can be tempting share some of the more intimate details of your life with your friends, marriage is sacred and the covenant you share with your spouse should be honored (Hebrews 13:4). Being reckless with the details of your more private moments can lead to a lack of trust in your relationship. If you’ve got something to say about your sex life, say it to your spouse.
2. Be honest.
The longer you’re married, the better you get to know your spouse. And while that is a blessing, it can sometimes lead one person to expect the other to know what he/she is thinking and feeling. You’re not married to a mind reader. Let your spouse know what you like, what you don’t like, what you’re comfortable with, and what you’re not comfortable with. We are commanded to be truthful with our words (Ephesians 4:25). That applies to all topics of conversation, including sex.
3. Celebrate what God meant for sex to be.
We serve a good God who gives good gifts to His children. Sex is one of those gifts! He created sex to be shared between a man and a woman within the bounds of marriage. When we come together physically, we also come together spiritually (Genesis 2:24).
Sex was designed by God to unite married couples as one flesh. So if you’re married, thank the Lord for sex!
Building a marriage that lasts requires effort on both parts and ultimately glorifies God. That means sex is a topic we cannot ignore. So settle in with your spouse, talk honestly about your sex life, and go celebrate. It can only get better from here.