Session 3

Say what’s on your mind

From Song of Solomon: A-17 Day Devotional

Solomon and his wife aren’t that different than a lot of couples today. The woman is insecure about the way she looks, and the man must deal with those feelings or they will be a barrier to intimacy. When she says, “I am a rose of Sharon, a lily of the valleys” (Song of Solomon 2:1), she is telling him, “I’m nothing special, just an ordinary wildflower.” But what she really wants to know is if the man she loves thinks she is beautiful.

Solomon is quick to assure her that he does indeed find her beautiful. She is a “lily among thorns” (Song of Solomon 2:2). In his eyes, her beauty has no equal. The power of his praise causes her barrier of self-consciousness to drop. Secure in his faithfulness and adoration, she is free to express her feelings without fear of rejection.

Her heart clings only to him. “Like an apple tree among the trees of the forest is my lover among the young men” (Song of Solomon 2:3). She relishes in the shelter, nourishment, and protection of his love.  Expressing her faith in him and fidelity to him inspires passion.

We can’t assume our spouses know how much we love and appreciate them. We have to tell them. 

This ancient love story illustrates a timeless principle: Our words matter. Our spouses don’t see themselves the way we do. We can’t assume they know how much we love and appreciate them; we have to tell them. If your wife has a great sense of humor, tell her. If your man is a great leader, say so.

When we regularly tell the one we love why we love him or her, we’re on our way to achieving the intimacy God intended when He invented marriage: “Adam and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame” (Genesis 2:25).


  • When was the last time you complimented the person you love? Is there anything that holds you back from doing that?
  • Is there anything you appreciate about your spouse that you assume he or she knows? How could you show your appreciation for him or her today?


3 of 17

Devotionals From This Study

to Discover More

Session 1

Do you and God share the same view of sex?

For many of us, the heat between Solomon and his wife feels like a fairy tale. We’ve grown up in a world that tells us sex is dirty...

Read Devotional

Session 2

Great chemistry doesn’t just happen

Over time, the word “love” has been stretched and twisted to describe things we feel strongly about, but don’t actually...

Read Devotional

Session 3

Say what’s on your mind

Solomon and his wife aren’t that different than a lot of couples today. The woman is insecure about the way she looks, and the man ...

Read Devotional

Session 4

Life is better when experienced together

When was the last time you put down your to-do list and Twitter feed long enough to experience the good things happening around you? Laug...

Read Devotional

Session 5

What would you do for the one you love?

What is the craziest thing you’ve ever done for the one you love? Maybe you got a tattoo with that person’s name or tried som...

Read Devotional

Session 6

Are you protecting your marriage?

With 50 percent of marriages ending in divorce, it's clear that many of us are not equipped for the challenges we enco...

Read Devotional

Session 7

Never run out of nice things to say

How would you complete this sentence: “God loves me so much …”? Maybe we would acknowledge His immeasurable grace and...

Read Devotional

Session 8

God made sex, and it is good

“I have come into my garden, my sister, my bride…” (Song of Solomon 5:1). Is Solomon describing what it sounds like h...

Read Devotional

Session 9

What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger

In life, we are going to face problems. And in marriage, we are going to encounter rough patches. How we face these situations can break...

Read Devotional

Session 10

Why you should marry your best friend

You finally get the first date with your crush. You spend hours getting ready, daydreaming about how perfect everything will be. Nervousl...

Read Devotional

Session 11

Who do you love more than your spouse?

Who is your best friend? Most of us think of childhood friends we played with, college roommates we got into trouble with, the parents we...

Read Devotional

Session 12

The honeymoon doesn’t have to end

Picture an elderly couple walking down the street holding hands, looking just as in love as they probably did 50 years ago? We see that a...

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Session 13

It takes three to make a thing go right

The intimacy God created for marriage rivals no other on this earth. And while we want to believe a relationship like Solomon’s is ...

Read Devotional

Session 14

Who makes the first move?

We all know the story. Boy meets girl. Boy asks girl out. Boy proposes to girl. They live happily ever after. Books, movies, and even th...

Read Devotional

Session 15

Why love is worth waiting for

Love is fun, adventurous, and enticing. The human heart seeks to know and to be known. We desire the beautiful mystery that is love. Our ...

Read Devotional

Session 16

The best way to beat temptation is to fight it together

Whether single or married, the temptation to stray from purity is always lurking. In Song of Solomon 8:9, the girl’s friends say, &...

Read Devotional

Session 17

The love story you want is worth waiting for

Just like health blogs and magazines teach us to eat better, exercise more, and get a decent amount of sleep, the media we consume teache...

Read Devotional

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