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Session 9

How to win in every disagreement

Read: Proverbs 9

Ever had a discussion turn into a heated disagreement? You both believe you’re right and want to change the other’s mind. It’s fun when we’re talking about sports or who gets the rose. But it can turn painful with serious topics like politics or religion.

First, consider your heart and the goal of the conversation. If either person is looking for a fight, it’s time to walk away. “Whoever corrects a mocker invites insults; whoever rebukes the wicked incurs abuse. Do not rebuke mockers or they will hate you … if you are a mocker, you alone will suffer” (Proverbs 9:7-8 and Proverbs 9:12). Arguing for the sake of arguing only brings pain, not godliness.

However, if you’re both seeking wisdom and bringing open minds and gentle spirits, you may both come away wiser. God’s wisdom is available to us all (Proverbs 9:1-6).

When we start a conversation with humility, recognizing our place before God, we’re in a great place to receive His wisdom. Proverbs 9:10 says, “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and knowledge of the Holy One is understanding.”

During the conversation, ask God to reveal His wisdom. Be open to receiving instruction from the other person, while gently offering instruction of your own. If we take this attitude into our disagreements, we’ll experience the benefits of Proverbs 9:9, “Instruct the wise and they will be wiser still; teach the righteous and they will add to their learning.”

Imagine what our relationships would look like if we took this approach. We would win every time because we’d either walk away, avoiding unnecessary fights, or we would each come away a little wiser.

Reflect:

  • When was the last time you had an argument in which one (or both) of you was arguing for the sake of arguing? How did that go?
  • How will you decide whether to you continue a discussion or walk away next time?
  • What is one way you can prepare to bring humility and gentleness to your next disagreement?

1

So you want to be wise?

So you want to be wise?

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2

The best way to find your way

The best way to find your way

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3

Is God mad at me?

Is God mad at me?

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4

You have access to a wealth of wisdom

You have access to a wealth of wisdom

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5

Flirting with trouble is more dangerous than you think

Flirting with trouble is more dangerous than you think

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6

Why you need to be leading you

Why you need to be leading you

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7

How to avoid getting pulled in again

How to avoid getting pulled in again

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8

How do we know what’s true?

How do we know what’s true?

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9

How to win in every disagreement

How to win in every disagreement

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10

Will they miss you when you’re gone?

Will they miss you when you’re gone?

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11

How are you measuring success in life?

How are you measuring success in life?

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12

Avoid fools if you don’t want to become one

Avoid fools if you don’t want to become one

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13

Lying won’t get you what you really want

Lying won’t get you what you really want

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14

The best place to find the truth is in the Bible

The best place to find the truth is in the Bible

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15

How to deal with anger

How to deal with anger

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16

Tomorrow is too big to try it alone

Tomorrow is too big to try it alone

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17

Use your words for good, not evil

Use your words for good, not evil

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18

Choose your words wisely

Choose your words wisely

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19

Learn to own your mistakes

Learn to own your mistakes

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20

Why the party scene won’t make you happy

Why the party scene won’t make you happy

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21

There’s no such thing as “get rich quick”

There’s no such thing as “get rich quick”

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22

Why you should care what other people think

Why you should care what other people think

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23

Passing down wisdom is the best gift you’ll give your kids

Passing down wisdom is the best gift you’ll give your kids

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24

With great wisdom comes great responsibility

With great wisdom comes great responsibility

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25

You can’t do the right thing without the right heart

You can’t do the right thing without the right heart

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26

How to know who is worthy of honor

How to know who is worthy of honor

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27

Is the way you handle conflict adding to the drama?

Is the way you handle conflict adding to the drama?

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28

What to look for in a leader

What to look for in a leader

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29

Why you should welcome discipline at any age

Why you should welcome discipline at any age

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30

Do you believe God is awesome?

Do you believe God is awesome?

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31

How to live a life of noble character

How to live a life of noble character

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