Session 10

A new way to talk about money

From Tighten The Knot: 14 Days to a Better Marriage

Think about the last argument you had with your spouse. If the fight started about money, you’re not alone. Money Magazine found that 70 percent of couples argue about money more than household chores, togetherness, sex, snoring, or what's for dinner. 

Few things can rile us up or put us on the defensive like someone questioning how we spend our money. That’s because how we spend money reveals what matters to us (Matthew 6:21). 

When we question each other’s spending, we’re usually not arguing over the actual dollars and cents, but about what they represent. For example, one spouse dropping hundreds on a shopping spree might mean the other has to give up a night out or pick up shifts to pay the car note. 

You can avoid a lot of resentment and anger if you both agree to submit to Jesus' priorities and expectations. This changes the way you talk about money because it puts you and your spouse on the same team. 

The conversation is no longer about who gets more. Instead, it’s about how both of you can get behind Jesus’ promises for your finances. You’re no longer pursuing two separate agendas, but submitting both of your agendas to the Lord. 

You’re no longer pursuing two separate agendas, but submitting both of your agendas to the Lord.

Jesus tells us not to worry about keeping up appearances or building our own kingdoms. Instead, Jesus tells us to spend our money on what will last. All the things we buy will one day fall apart or disappear. None of our stuff comes with us into eternity (1 Timothy 6:7). But our relationships? Our faith? These are forever things worth fighting for. 

We can spend our marriage fighting against each other, or we can spend time fighting for unity. A constantly squabbling family disintegrates, but a family pursuing Jesus will grow closer together (Mark 3:24-25). 

Question for him:

  • What is most important to you when it comes to your family’s budget? 

  • Is what’s important to you important to Jesus? Why?

  • If you could change one thing about how your family manages money, what would it be?

Question for her:

  • What is most important to you when it comes to your family’s budget? 

  • Is what’s important to you important to Jesus? Why?

  • If you could change one thing about how your family manages money, what would it be?

Questions to talk about together:

  • Share what you wrote with each other. What’s one step you can take to rework your family budget to pursue those priorities?


Don’t have a family budget? Get free budgeting tools or make an appointment with a financial coach at newspring.cc/finances. 

10 of 14

Devotionals From This Study

to Discover More

Session 1

What it means for two people to become one

We are told from the outset that in marriage “two become one.” But with all the differences between you and your spouse, how is it possib...

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Session 2

Tired of feeling misunderstood?

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Session 3

Three steps to better communication

Does it ever feel like you and your spouse speak completely different languages? You say one thing, your spouse hears another, and so beg...

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Session 4

Are you winning the arguments in your marriage?

How often do you look at your spouse and think no one on the planet would agree with his or her point of view?  So many times, what star...

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Session 5

How to keep the friendship alive

“I love you, and I like you.”  When was the last time you heard or said these words to your spouse? Falling in love seems to be the easy...

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Session 6

How are you serving your spouse?

When was the last time you considered your spouse’s feelings and needs first and served them without keeping score? There are many ways t...

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Session 7

How to be more romantic

"Do you have a reservation?" "Yes. Do you have a table ready for me and the girl of my dreams?" Cue butterflies, batting eyelashes, and...

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Session 8

The best sex is sacred

God created sex, and it is good!  When God brought Adam and Eve together in the Garden of Eden for the first marriage ceremony, they wer...

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Session 9

Why dreaming together is a powerful practice

We were designed to dream.  According to psychologists and neuroscientists, looking into the future, consciously and unconsciously, is u...

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Session 10

A new way to talk about money

Think about the last argument you had with your spouse. If the fight started about money, you’re not alone. Money Magazine found that 70 ...

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Session 11

You are a new family who can make new traditions

One love story, one ceremony, one brand-new life starting from two totally different families.   When you marry, you are gaining a spous...

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Session 12

Are you forgetting your first love?

For many married couples, adding kids to the family is the next “natural” progression in life. The joy you feel when you look into that s...

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Session 13

Disappointments don’t have to break your marriage

We all encounter loss or disappointment at some point in our life. Where do you go when you don’t get the job, when your kids decide they...

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Session 14

Commit to more than not getting divorced

When it comes to setting goals, we tend to focus on performance rather than purpose. As a result, we frame goals negatively. We vow, “I’m...

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